Friends

The greatest things in life come for free - family & friends. I believe that I'm truly blessed to have the greatest family and most supportive friends anyone could wish for.

My best friend has to be my friend from elementary school - I previously referred to her as The Giant in another post. She, without a doubt, is indispensable. When I had my scoliosis operation (there will be several posts dedicated to scoliosis), she would wait for me to carry my bag and books for me. I never recall her complaining about it to anyone and she would joke about how one of these days, I'd return the favour. Sixteen years later, our friendship is still as solid as ever. We've done everything together from going on holidays to going ballistic at a Bon Jovi concert. I will never forget her high - fiving everyone when he started singing Living On A Prayer. She casually rings up and says :"I'm starving, so I'm coming over to your end of town for some sushi". My "end of town" is about half an hour away. She does this every few weeks. I'm telling you, she's a nut, but I love her to bits. Bring on October because we both have a busy month!!

Next on my list would be Bass-man. He's someone I've known for about five or six years and he's truly amazing. This guy seriously has the IT factor. He has looks, talent, personality, modesty, humour and lots more. In a lot of girls' eyes, he's perfect. If I didn't love him like my own brother, then hell, I'd go for him, but it's a bit awkward haha. Since I've known him, Bass-man has given me advice on everything ranging from family, friends, guys, relationships, work - everything! If I've ever needed to vent, he's the person I turn to. He also says the most random things at the right moment. The Bass-man is unique and as long as we're friends, I'll always need him. 

Persian Princess is someone who can relate to everything I've been through these last couple of years. We've both had our health scares, lost people we cherish, and had interesting relationships. I wrote about Persian Princess in my blog "The Case of the Ex". She's the friend Clyde caused problems with. Just to touch on that, when we weren't speaking, she decided to approach me and recommended burying the hatchet. I think that pretty much sums up just how good a person she truly is. We text almost every day and have pledged to meet up at least once a month. I truly wish, from the bottom of my heart, that Persian Princess is blessed with the one thing she wants. Fingers crossed for her.

Scorpio is a unique thirty something year old I've known roughly as long as Bass-man. Ironically, they're both Scorpios - I know the irony eh? Scorpio has had a fair few bummed relationships, career changes, and interesting holidays. He lives inter-state, but I wish he was closer. We have a lot in common, mainly our love for zodiac signs. I think the shortest conversation we've ever had over the phone  is about and hour and a half. Like Bass-man, Scorpio's given me lots of advice, but it's usually about my love life. He can name every guy I've mentioned to him, dated, fought with, loved, or just perved at. Presently, in terms of love, I'm at a crossroads, and he's managed to find his dream woman - in Poland! He's brought her over and I've heard nothing but amazing stories about her ever since his return. I couldn't be happier for him.

Mr Red is someone I work with at work. No, he doesn't have red hair. Red just happens to be the colour of his cigarette packet. I've known him a little over a year and we've shared lots of stories and problems. He actually warned me about my relationship with Clyde. We were all out for drinks and I spoke with Mr Red and asked him :"What do you think about Clyde?" His answer was : " I'll let you know on Monday". When we finally spoke on Monday, he said "Enforcer, you need to forget about this guy. He's selfish, and he's a player. Trust me on this one". Being the stubborn arse I am, I didn't listen. The great thing, though, is that he never said "I told you so" and he's always supported me. Mr Red loves my mum's cooking and can't stop asking for it - he's even offered to pay her! God love him, but I could never do that to him. Instead, he gets his goodies for free.

Nomad is also someone from work that I'm getting to know. She's unique, well spoken, patient, and above all, beautiful inside and out. We haven't known each other long, but she's definitely left a lasting impression on me. I'm surprised she hasn't told me to piss off yet because I'm one of the noisiest people you can work with. She recommended blogging to release my negative energy and to express myself. I think it's slowly working and her idea, as always, was brilliant. Nomad and I are both ex teachers, have a love for the road, and get along like a house on fire. Since I've been sick, she's always reminded me to take my medicine and urged me to see a doctor when she believes it's urgent. In return, I'm feeding her lots of chips and chocolate. Hey, it's all from love and I'm eating the stuff, too. We understand each other and she knows that whenever I get on her nerves, all she has to do is tell me. She knows when I need a hug, when I need to vent, or just need a walk. Thank you, Nomad! xo.

Hopefully, wherever life takes me, I'll be able to make friends as great as the ones in this blog. They're incredibly special and unique for different reasons. Love you all.

The Relatives

Who doesn't have stories to tell about their extended family? Having lived in a few places, you come across some of the weirdest crap in the form of cousins. My parents brought me and my siblings up with one word and attitude in mind regarding relatives - respect. Unfortunately, they don't share the same sentiments for us. I don't know why, but I've always felt closer to my father's side of the family. We've always dreaded family visits to mum's side of the family especially me.
Here's a little insight for you. I was raised in a small town on the South Coast called Woonona and the closest relatives we had to us were my dad's. My dad's sister, brother, niece, nephews and their respective families were all we had. On the other hand, my mum's sister and brother lived in Sydney. Every Friday night, my dad's brother would come over with his family for dinner, laughs, and football. We would pay them a visit every Saturday for the same reason. It was great and I always looked forward to it. Mum's siblings, in contrast, would only make an effort once a month or once every few months. To be fair, though, my mum's sister would call each night and come over at least once a month. Regardless, we never bonded with mum's side of the family, and let's face it, we never will. My aunt always has something wrong with her and my uncle has major domestic issues with his wife. Their kids weren't half bad - well, some of them at least. Whenever we had to make the 90 minute trip to Sydney, we'd all cringe and start making excuses to mum and dad, but to no avail. 
Twenty odd years, family losses and tragedies later, things have changed quite dramatically. My parents have been back home for just over two and a half years, and it saddens me to have to say this, most of my relatives have let them down when it matters most. My sister passed away in January 2009 and we were surrounded by hundreds of people. This was the only time I had seen ALL my relatives in one place at the same time. No, actually, I lied. There was one other time and that was earlier this year when my grandfather died. That's it. Two deaths brought us together. So, could someone explain to me where the hell everyone else is when our immediate family isn't carking it? Let the stories begin (bear in mind, these stories aren't from my childhood - they're a few years old).
My mum's nephew - let's call him The Wizard -  has always been a maths wiz. Therefore, when The Wizard decided to study mechanical engineering at uni, it wasn't a big surprise. His brother, The Braggart, opted to study accounting in order to teach at local schools and universities. Their youngest sibling, The Brat, also wanted to become a teacher. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm proud to say we have some unique talent in the family, but I'm not too thrilled about the way they treat others, particularly my family. 
There was one particular moment that stands out mainly because I was the target. A couple of years ago, I had an accident and my dad's car got written off. Months later, the extended family was gathered at my Uncle's for lunch. Braggart decided to try humiliating me by calling me a lame driver who couldn't get 200m past her own home. Pretty much everyone who was there laughed, but I didn't keep quiet. My cousin is known for his insurance jobs and writing off his cars for the sake of buying new ones. I pointed out that I worked for one of the sister companies of his car insurance and said I had access to his accidents if I wanted. Then, I boldly said " No matter how many cars I've written off, I'll never catch up to you." That was the last time he or anyone else mentioned the accident. Touché.
As for my mum's nephews on her brother's side, well two of them are absolute stand outs - in other words, dickheads. I'll call one Pussyman (his wife wears the pants) and the other one Noise Pollution. Pussyman is a painter and he was called by my brother a few weeks before my nephew's christening to do a touch up job on the house. I can look past the fact he's a lazy git who spends more time on the phone than with a paint brush in his hand, but I can't get over how big his mouth is. He would speak to my brother and sister in law openly and rudely about my sister. I'm not sure what his problem is with my sister or her family because they've always texted regularly and shared secrets when they were younger. His main point of conversation always centred around her four children. In his opinion, they were spoilt. My nieces and nephews are not angels, but they're definitely not spoilt. My sister knows when to say yes and when to say no. He, on the other hand, has three kids - 2 girls and a boy. I'm not one to call kids names or hold them responsible for their antics, but his kids take the prize for spoilt little runts. They're always asking for more clothes, food, trips to the movies, and a hell of a lot more. Pussyman and his wife take them at least 4 times a week to the movies. So, um, who the hell are you calling my sister's kids spoilt? Arabs are the biggest hypocrites, and we always criticise others for mistakes we have made.
As for Noise Pollution, well, where do I start with him? This guy reminds me of Clyde - an insecure player who thinks he's king shit. Remember how I mentioned that my uncle has major domestics? Well, I happen to think those issues have somehow affected Noise Pollution. He dated a certain girl for over 5 years and everyone had their reservations because she was much younger than him. At the end of the day, they broke up and Noise Pollution's excuse was : "Bro, she was too young." It took you five years to figure that out? Shucks. He's now going out with someone I considered a close friend at one stage, but that all went down the drain. I won't bother going into that because I know for a fact that her change in demeanour has been affected by him. 
The Wizard, Braggart, Pussyman & Noise Pollution were made for each other. Pussyman and Noise Pollution are always over at Wizard & Braggart's house. It's amazing how my parents' home is closer, yet the pigs don't even bother calling in on their aunt. Whenever there's a family function, such as Pussyman's son's christening, every Tom, Dick & Harry is invited - everyone except my mum. I simply don't understand. We've always made an effort for mum to bond with the cousins, but they've always distanced themselves from us. We weren't on their "exclusive" list for New Year's Eve and we certainly weren't invited to their nights out at the casino. The Brat wanted to go to Europe and asked me to go so that my aunt would let her go. This went on for months and when my aunt relented and said : "You can go with your friend", I was out of the picture. It's amazing how they all think.
I'm not bitter, pissed, or spiteful. In fact, I'm actually quite baffled. What have any of us done to them to deserve their treatment? Seriously, I can count on one hand how many times my "awesome" cousins have come over our place. Whenever they do, Braggart is always asking how much I paid for certain appliances and subscriptions. Mate, you have a phone and Internet connection, why don't you get off your baboon arse and ask around? I even get asked about my wages! What the hell is it to you? Your brother makes twice as much as I do. Just because you and your sister are stuck in retail because you can't be stuffed finding jobs, it doesn't give you the right to pry into my business. While you idiots are partying and spending your earnings freely because you live under mummy and daddy's roof, my siblings and I are working our butts off trying to make ends meet and pay off our mortgages. 
In a nutshell, I don't hate my relatives, but I don't particularly like them. I think they're nosy, arrogant, and above all, snotty. My siblings and I couldn't give two tosses about their opinions or anything they do. I'm quite relieved that I don't have to socialise with them, but it breaks my heart because my mum doesn't see too much of them. She says she doesn't care, but knowing my mum, she does. The only thing I can do is encourage her to see her brother and sister as often as possible. Quite frankly, she sees my dad's brother more than she sees her own. At least my dad's brother calls every few days to check in on us whereas mum's brother only calls when someone's kicked the bucket. 
Who needs family, eh?

The Case of the Ex

I think it's time I got a bit more personal with my posts. I've written a fair bit in only two blogs. If you may recall, I mentioned in my first post a certain ex who called me an "angry child". Well, this Angry Child thinks it's high time she vents and tells her side of the story.
Let's call this ex Clyde. Not very creative, I know, but there's a story behind that, too. I won't get into it now. Anyway, Clyde and I first met, albeit briefly, in 2009 through a guy I was seeing. How about we call him Philo? To be honest, I wouldn't even classify Philo as someone I was seeing because we were only getting to know each other. When we met, it was only for a two minute walk to the local station. His name didn't stick in my head back then, but little did I know, that it would some time later.
Fast forward to mid 2010. I was about to move to a new team at work and as it was a long weekend, I decided to go out with some mates from work for some drinks. I sent Philo a text and he showed up with Clyde. This is the turning point for all three of us. From the moment Clyde sat down, he started flirting and messing around. It wasn't until later that night that he had told me that he was engaged. Uh-oh was my first thought. That should have been a sign for things to come, but being the dumb idiot I tend to be, I ignored it. We went our separate ways that night and only exchanged work emails.
Philo went on holidays about a month after that and for Clyde to pass time at work, he'd email me. Emails went back and forth for weeks. About a month later, he tells me that he and his fiancee had broken up. Frankly, I wasn't expecting it, and I knew for a fact that he'd been sick of constantly looking after her. I didn't know what to say or how to react because he didn't say much - only that he was really upset and needed time to work things out.
A few months down the track, and fresh from my trip overseas, I get a lunch invitation from Clyde for a catch up. Until this point, we hadn't exchanged numbers. We met up a few days later and had lunch - nothing fancy and nothing really special was said or done. Only difference was we actually exchanged numbers and started texting from that moment onwards.
I had a work function not long after our lunch rendez-vous and before it started, everyone had opted to meet up for drinks. Once again, Clyde & Philo were invited and came along. That night, a fair few people met them and Clyde was caught checking out one of my married friends. Big mistake, but I didn't say anything. At about midnight, I got a text from him telling me she was hot and what not. I scolded him because she's married and I don't like people talking about my friends that way. My poor friend was in the cab with me when the text from him hit my phone, and I was rendered speechless. My friend ended up speaking with Philo and spilled her guts to him about it. The next day, yours truly gets an email at work from Clyde telling me off for blabbing about the text to Philo. I tried explaining everything to him and he got the dirts. Well, excuse me, Mr Hotshot, I didn't realise someone had hurt your feelings for telling the truth. Thanks to him, my friend and I didn't speak to each other for over 7 weeks. We both moved on from that fiasco, but it's not the point. This was again another sign that I missed.
After my issues with my friend, Clyde & I were texting on a daily basis at least 50-80 times a day. Yeah, I know...WOW! Clyde had ended his rebound relationship weeks earlier and things were going pretty well between us. In fact, I think you can say things were progressing quite rapidly. A few weeks later, Clyde, Philo & I went out for lunch for my birthday. It was an awesome time, and I think, at this point, Philo was starting to feel like an outcast. I can't blame him, but these things do happen. I certainly didn't intend for that to happen.
Just before Christmas, Clyde came clean and admitted that he liked me. I didn't really read too much into it because I wasn't certain how I felt about him myself. He asked me out the first time, but I declined his invitation and made up some bollocks excuse. He didn't ask me again until after New Year. This time, I had no excuse to say no and I felt I was ready to take the next step and see what this guy was like.
Let's skip the dates, dinners, texts, and drinks and just move onto March where things had taken an ugly turn. I had bought a special birthday present for him - something he admitted to have wanted for years. The gift arrived well after his birthday, but at least it made it. For some reason, I had a horrible gut feeling - the same gut feeling I had when my ex of 6 years was cheating on me. I knew for a fact that there was someone else, but I didn't feel the need to confront him. Let's not beat around the bush and just say things were over after that.
We didn't speak for a while after that, but about 2 months later, after things had cooled off between us, I get a random text from Clyde asking how I am. Erm, like you give a toss, pal. Nevertheless, I still replied and said I was doing fine. I have always backed away from everyone when things go bad. I don't text or email anyone when a relationship derails, and this wasn't any different. The only time I'd speak with Clyde is when he would text me. I know better than to trust the same person after screwed over.
Months later, the texts have become more regular and the excuses to send them even lamer. I don't even know why he still texts. He ended it, he wasn't ready and gave me the shit excuse of " I was engaged to be married". Well, BFD, so was I and I didn't give you that. What a cop out.
He checks in on me about 9 weeks ago, and one of my mates from work grabs a hold of my phone and tells him he's my boyfriend. I have to admire the man's courage, but it won't make much of a difference. Clyde fesses to seeing a new chick, but he's bored with her. Surprise, surprise. Been there and done that.
Just last night, he texts me telling me he's bored and on the way home. When I asked how I could help him, all he could say was: "well hahaha". I'm going to quote John McEnroe here because my first thought was " You cannot be serious!" Apparently, the "girl" he is seeing is on holidays. The picture was becoming clearer and it something had hit me right on the head. This is exactly what happened when we were together. I don't know if this guy is stupid, or just horny 24/7, but he gave his game away. When I pieced together all the signs along the way, it all made sense - this guy's a massive player. He's probably one of the best I've come across, but as my best friend always says, I only see the good qualities in people.
Regardless, Clyde's chapter in my life is over and I'm only going to speak to him when he makes the first move. My friend at work asked me why I keep in touch with him. Well, it's not that simple, but I don't have a reason to hate him. I don't have a reason to love him or like him. Actually, I feel sorry for him. He's someone who can't seem to find any stability in his life. I, on the other hand, have had a stable upbringing and always given everything I do 110%. Funnily enough, I hope to help Clyde because he's still a friend and I just want to let him see things differently. I'm sure there's bound to be another post somewhere down the track where I'll mention Clyde again.


If the names Clyde & Philo seem a bit weird, my best advice would be to refer to the Clint Eastwood movies: Any Which Way But Loose & Any Which Way You Can.
Clyde is pretty much a hairy orangutan and Philo is his owner. Nuff said ;)